With dementia, what’s the meaning behind Caregiving?

When was the last time you did something completely new with someone you know who has dementia?
Maybe you took your mother to a new restaurant. Went for ice cream with your partner. Tried line dancing with a friend. Explored a neighbourhood you had never visited before. Or maybe, like many of us, your visits tend to follow a familiar routine: coffee, conversation, a quick check-in and then home.

Alzheimer Calgary wants us to rethink those visits. Its StillMe movement is encouraging people to spend time in a different way by adding a little adventure, curiosity and fun. The message behind the campaign is simple but powerful: “It’s still me in here.” Jill Petrovic, Lead of the StillMe Movement at Alzheimer Calgary, says the idea grew out of research into the stigma surrounding dementia.

“We heard things like the all-encompassing fear people had regarding dementia,” Petrovic says. People often don’t understand the different types of dementia, she says, and some believe a diagnosis means there is no longer any hope or optimism.

“There’s no known cure, so what’s the point in getting a diagnosis?” is a question people sometimes ask. That kind of thinking can lead to isolation. People may be afraid to tell others they have dementia because of the label and, depending on their cultural background, there can be additional social consequences.
StillMe is an attempt to change that thinking. “It’s about wanting people to reframe their thinking and to see the person first,” Petrovic says.

A dementia diagnosis can change a person’s abilities. But Petrovic says it doesn’t erase their personality, humour, interests, curiosity or capacity to connect. “We want to help people make the most of the time,” she says. Petrovic has experienced this with her own father, who lived with frontotemporal dementia, a type of dementia that can affect personality and behaviour.

For a period of time, her father seemed to be becoming someone the family didn’t recognize. He had always been kind, fun and loving, but he became quick to anger and more depressed. “We knew something was off,” she says. At that point, Petrovic admits, she might have questioned the whole idea behind StillMe. Her family didn’t know what was happening. They only knew that her father was different and more difficult.

Then came the diagnosis. 

“It was like a new set of prescription lenses,” Petrovic says. Once the family understood what her father was experiencing, they could begin to identify things that were triggering or overwhelming him. For example, they discovered that he didn’t like darkness. During Calgary’s cold, dark winter days, they turned on more lights. “And we had the old dad back,” Petrovic says.His funny jokes returned. So did his witty conversations and his love of music. “It all came back once we could eliminate the problem for him,” she says.

That experience helped reinforce something at the heart of StillMe: sometimes what looks like a change in personality may actually be a person struggling with their environment or with something they can no longer easily communicate.

They may be overwhelmed, overstimulated or tired. Perhaps they were never a morning person, yet family members are trying to get them out of the house at 9 a.m. Understanding those challenges can make it easier to connect. And connection doesn’t have to mean doing something elaborate.

A new Fall 2026 Campaign

StillMe is encouraging people to find activities that are new to both people Petrovic suggests everything from trying six different ice cream shops and deciding which one is best, to going to a play, listening to a podcast, exploring a new coffee shop or trying a cheese tasting at home.

For someone who loves adventure, it might mean laser tag or a roller coaster. For someone with mobility or health limitations, the adventure might come to them. Bring a new playlist. Cook a favourite meal. Invite a furry friend to visit. Look through photo albums. Try an art project. Play a game. Sit outside in a nearby green space. “Sometimes we overthink,” Petrovic says. The idea isn’t to complete an activity perfectly. Plans can change. Energy levels can fluctuate. The important thing is the shared experience. Petrovic remembers that her father, a computer scientist who was very factual by nature, unexpectedly developed a passion for painting through an arts program. “We thought he’s never going to do that,” she says. But he started coming home with paintings of Lake Louise. He had discovered something new.

That is another reason Petrovic cautions against making assumptions about older adults — particularly people living with dementia. We may think we know what someone likes based on their past. But people can continue to discover new interests throughout their lives. And sometimes the most meaningful adventures aren’t new at all. For someone experiencing memory loss, revisiting a favourite restaurant, park or neighbourhood can become a joyful experience again and again. “Imagine getting to rediscover your favourite places over and over again if you have memory challenges,” Petrovic says.

There is also a potential brain-health benefit to novelty. Petrovic points to research suggesting that new experiences, social connection and activities that challenge us can be beneficial for brain health and may help address some modifiable risk factors associated with dementia. But she stresses that StillMe isn’t about turning every visit into a cognitive workout. It’s about having fun. “Adventure is any kind of connection,” she says. “Any kind of visit.” And that adventure can happen at almost any age or ability level.

StillMe also hopes to challenge the ageism that often accompanies dementia. Petrovic says that once people develop grey hair and wrinkles, they can begin to be viewed as somehow different.
Add cognitive changes and the assumptions can become even stronger. StillMe asks us to look beyond those labels. A person living with dementia may need more support than they once did. Their abilities may change. Their world may become smaller. But that doesn’t mean there isn’t still a person inside who wants to laugh, listen to music, try something new, tell a story or simply spend time with someone they love.
“The limits are your creativity and your enthusiasm,” Petrovic says.

So the next time you’re planning a visit with an older parent, grandparent, neighbour or friend, consider changing the question. Instead of asking, “What are we going to talk about?” Ask: “What could we try together?” It might be something completely new. It might be something you’ve always wanted to do.
Or it might be something as simple as sharing a favourite song and telling the stories that come with it.
The laughs and stories that emerge, Petrovic says, can be an adventure in themselves.

To find ideas and learn more about the StillMe movement, visit StillMe.ca.

And remember the message at the heart of it all: It’s still me in here.